Will I Ever Feel Good Enough?
Will I Ever Feel Good Enough?
A human perspective on anxiety, perfectionism, and self-worth
If you’ve ever asked yourself “Will I ever feel good enough?”, you’re not alone.
Many people struggle with feelings of not being enough, whether that’s at work, in relationships, or simply in how they see themselves. These feelings are often linked to anxiety and perfectionism, and they can leave you feeling exhausted, disconnected, and never satisfied with your achievements.
The Connection Between Perfectionism and Anxiety
Perfectionism can seem like a positive trait: aiming high, working hard, wanting to do your best or look your best. But there can be hidden costs to this and spending significant time focusing on what’s missing, what could have been better, or how you compare to others.
Over time, this can:
• Increase anxiety and self-doubt
• Make it hard to celebrate your successes
• Leave you feeling like nothing you do is enough
This creates a cycle of perfectionism fuelling anxiety, anxiety fuelling more striving, and your self-worth becoming tied to and reinforced by achievement rather than who you are.
It’s worth noting that there is a difference between wanting to do a good job and perfectionism. The desire to do something well can be healthy and motivating. It often comes with flexibility, pride in progress, and the ability to adapt if things don’t go exactly to plan. Perfectionism, on the other hand, is rigid. It tells you that anything short of flawless is failure, leaving little room for learning, enjoyment, or self-compassion.
Why “Good Enough” Can Feel Out of Reach
Our beliefs about being “good enough” often start in childhood. If you learned that love, attention, or approval depended on good grades, good behaviour, or keeping others happy, you may have developed the belief that your value is conditional.
This is a natural human response to wanting to feel accepted and safe, but it can lead to a lifelong pattern of measuring yourself against impossible standards.
A Humanistic View: You Are Enough
From a humanistic counselling perspective, your worth is not something you need to earn. You are valuable simply because you exist. You are more than your productivity, more than your appearance, and more than the challenges you’ve faced.
Therapy can help you:
• Understand where your self-doubt began
• Recognise the unrealistic expectations you’re holding
• Develop self-compassion and acceptance
• Find freedom from the “never enough” mindset
You Don’t Have to Struggle Alone
If you relate to the feeling of never being good enough and want explore those feelings and experiences of perfectionism or anxiety, talking with a counsellor can help.
I offer humanistic counselling in Worthing and Littlehampton, as well as online counselling across the UK.
Together, we can explore your story in a safe, supportive space and help you reconnect with a sense of worth that isn’t dependent on perfection.
You can find out more or get in touch through my contact page.
